Monday, May 18, 2009

You've got to give the people what they want

I believe Sara B's actual words were, "Kautzis, give the people what they want! There hasn't been a new blog entry since May 10th!"  Well, Sara, we've heard you.  But, before I simply concede to such demands, there's something I've got to get off my chest.  You see Sara, I've deduced that you belong to an underground majority of folks to whom I've given the title, Our Silent Audience.  I've got to say that I'm a bit dumbfounded by these quiet observers we have acquired.  Here's what I have to say to you, you mute followers.  You do us no good.  I mean, what point is there to all of the narcissism that constitutes this blog if not for the authors to enjoy the commentary of our faithful readers? So to you, who have all these opinions about the frequency of our entries, you who have applied ambiguous threats such as, "you know, the less you write your blog, the less awesome your kid will become" (cough, Mikey, cough, cough), you who place upon us the burden to entertain and amuse you - to each and all of you, I have only this to say:  Leave us a comment and we'll give you what you want. 

On a similar note, I'd like to award the first ever Kautzi Kommentor Award (yes, we're German) to Dave Coates, whose amusing comments have made me question on a number of occasions whether it was in fact him or perhaps just another anonymous dave who got lost in cyberspace and thought he was commenting on an entirely different blog.  One that had a lot more to do with gypsies and Japanese horror movies and a lot less to do with morning sickness and baby name drama.  Regardless, this week's Kautzi Kommentor Award is our gift of gratitude to you, Dave.

Okay, on to the good stuff.  So, we've got our first sonogram scheduled for Wednesday evening.  The only prep work I have to do for this is to drink four 8 oz glasses of water an hour prior to the appointment and not pee until the sonogram's done.  Sounds simple right?  Not right.  Considering tonight alone, I've only drunk maybe a total of 20 oz of liquid and I've already had to run (and I mean run) to the bathroom 4 times, I'm thinking this could be a bit of a problem.  So, Baby, here's your first request/order from your mama.  Be cooperative for your little photo session tomorrow so your mommy doesn't pee her pants on the exam table.  That will not be a fond memory, I promise you.  Also, I'm sorry about the 2 enchiladas I ate tonight.  I know that's not doing either of us any good.

In case you aren't keeping track like we are (I know you are - why wouldn't you be?), our baby is now the size of "a medium green olive."  Which in my opinion, is a relatively, well, relative descriptor.  Is there some standard measurement of a green olive that I'm not aware of?  In fact, I'd like to take this opportunity to also address this issue in cooking as well.  Maybe I'm just too novice a chef, but a medium onion, medium potato, medium pepper, medium olive just doesn't help me when there are 15 different variations of sizes of each type of produce.  Am I missing something?  Am I just too perfectionistic and analytical?  Don't answer that.

Speaking of perfectionistic and analytical, it's amazing to think that along with its heart and lungs and brain and pancreas and finger touch pads and intestines and eyelids and ears our baby is also currently developing its little personality.  A crazy little blend of Eric and me which could turn out incredibly awesome (Eric's creativity and wit and my...good...qualities...) or incredibly unfortunate (my perfectionism and Eric's wild indifference for organization and structure).  Let's just hope that whatever exotic balance this child reveals, that its two differing and yet complementary genes aren't at constant war with each other.  

Actually, during worship last night at church I was praying for the baby and the only thing I could really think to ask for is that this child has a unique and sincere connection and understanding of our creative and perfectionistic Father.  I just pray that our child will know in whose image he or she was created.  And that whichever qualities he inherits from his parents, they are intentional - if not slightly dwarfed and off-kilter - representations of the character and personality of the Creator.  In His image He created them.  Male and female He created them.  Analytical and free-spirited He created them.  Even-tempered and dramatic He created them.  Cautious and impulsive He created them.  And whether or not we feel it or believe it, He said it was good.  So it must be.

17 comments:

Lindsey said...

Kels, I'm hoping you're getting fat. I'm sorry. I am. I mean, I'm ready for you to look pregnant already.

Anonymous said...

comment from fan

Sarah said...

I am thoroughly enjoying the posts you and Eric are writing. I can hardly imagine that you even considered depriving so many of the humor, joy, and drama that comes with the pregnancy experience. I'm excited to see what kind of Eric-Kelsey combination this baby is and I hope he/she gets many of your GOOD qualities!! And yes, the sonogram will be soooo uncomfortable with all that water inside, but I can't wait to see the first shots of the beautiful little medium green olive! :)

Love you and miss you!!

jordanne said...

I.

jordanne said...

Get.

jordanne said...

Commenter.

jordanne said...

Of.

jordanne said...

The.

jordanne said...

Week.

jordanne said...

Award.

jordanne said...

Oh, and P.S. Who was it that sang "You can't always get what you want? No, you can't always get want you want?" I believe they were correct-o-mundo.

Kelsey said...

um, Jordanne, that's the Kautzi Kommentor Award. and you've got to do better than that to earn this prestigious award.

Jessica Kahler said...

kelsey....you're just trying to get people to comment on YOUR post so you can beat Eric for comments when he posts nexts and doesn't make such a big stink about comments.

i see RIGHT through you kelsey kautzi. and i'm NOT going to fall into your little trap.

Anonymous said...

Kelsey, I love your blog and just happened to look tonight. I hope your sonogram went well. I think about you and your little daily. I hope all it going extremely well. You need to email me back tooo...please! I will send you a couple new pics of Tonybug! Love and miss you Too!! Katy

Anonymous said...

sorry, your little one..I am getting tired!!

amy said...

Kelsey. A of all, you should get a stat-counter. Comments are few and far between in the blogging world, and you'll feel less like you're shouting into a black hole when you see that yes! 100 people visited your blog! even though only 2 commented! Truly. B of all, I'm very excited to see what personality this little Eric/Kelsey mixture is going to have. I was actually JUST talking about that the other night, believe it or not. :) C of all, I like you.

Kelsey said...

Jessica,
nu-uh.