Wednesday, January 16, 2013

If it's not good yet, he's not done.

My dad sent me a link to devotional podcast he listens to every day as an encouragement in our long and ever-changing adoption journey.  The guy giving the devotional is talking about a passage in 1 Chronicles in which the author is giving the lineage of someone.  Honestly, I usually just skip over that stuff when I come to it, don't you?  But the guy calls it "stunning."  I think I snorted a little bit when he first said that.

But then he goes on to read a little break in the lineage where the author tells the quick story of a descendent whose only two sons are killed.  The father mourns his boys and then sleeps with his wife again and she becomes pregnant with another son who they name Beriah.  Then the lineage continues and Beriah ends up being an ancestor of Joshua who would, of course, eventually lead God's people into the Promised Land.

The point he's making is that when we face trials in our life, we often question why.  But we can only see the short view of our story.  God sees the long view.  He sees how it all fits together.

The guy doing the devotional ends it with this: "Even if there are things that you come across in the short view that are hard to understand, trust his goodness in the long view because in the long view, He makes all things good.  And if it's not good yet, He's not done."

If it's not good yet, He's not done.

That is stunning.

Isn't that what the oft-quoted scripture in Hebrews 11 is suggesting?

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.

Or you could say, "Faith is having confidence that there is a long view of our lives, despite the fact that we live in the short view." We live our lives in the short view, but it is our faith in God's goodness and promises that allows us to hope for the long view.

Our adoption journey is a perfect illustration for this.  I see it that way - in the short view.  Of course I do!  It's the only perspective I have!  But every so often, I have felt like I have gotten a glimpse at the long view, even if it's only by turning back to see the brush strokes painted by each twist and turn.

In fact, the amount of changes we've made to the Master Plan is somewhat comical.  I recently wrote in an email to our friends who have been praying for us for the past two years about our adoption(s), " If we have learned anything from the last two years on this adoption journey, it is that we are not holding the road map - just the compass.  We come to intersections and hold up our compass and ask the Lord 'Which way is North?' and then we walk that direction.  I've long since given up on guessing where we are headed.  I'm sure to those watching us we must look confused and indecisive at best and noncommittal and fickle at worst.  But we hope that those of you who are getting this email can see our hearts in this - we just want to be obedient.  We are learning to trust, to let go, and to trust the Map-Maker to lead us well.  We know that HE knows who our next child is, even if we are unsure."

When we first began our Ethiopian adoption, we predicted we would be home with our child by now!  I laughed when I read a letter I wrote to the parents of my students the fall of 2011 when I said we expected to have our baby home no later than the end of 2012!  At the time that seemed like a conservative estimate!  But here we are at the dawn of 2013 with a long stretch of road dragging behind us and we once again are holding up that compass, asking the God of the Long View to direct our paths.

And I hesitate to say it - because I've been so wrong before - but we really think this is it.  It makes too much sense not to be.  When we think about this latest turn, we can actually see the long view - the rest of the story makes sense!

I know I'm dragging this out, and partly it's because I want to paint an accurate picture of how we came to be here telling you something new AGAIN.  It's important to me that I communicate it well because you all have been so supportive to us.  I feel a great responsibility to use your support - your prayers, your generous dollars given that have filled our fundraising thermometers to overflowing, your words of encouragement and hopes spent on our behalf - in obedience.  So I want to be really clear that this is not a change of heart or a decision made out of desperation or on a whim - this feels to us like the missing piece of the puzzle.  It feels like the release that all of our hopes and plans and dreams and prayers have been building up to.  It feels good, in the most Godly sense of the word.

So, if you'll indulge me, I want to turn to yet another new chapter.  One that took us by surprise, but that fits oh-so-perfectly into our story.  It's a story of answered prayers, of grace upon grace, of peace that passes understanding.  It's a story of Faith.

I'll tell you this story.  Tomorrow.

1 comment:

The Vaughan Family said...

You're killing me, Kelsey!!! Spit it out, already!!! :)