Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Things are happening!

When I was pregnant with Lila, I had a conversation with my friend and doula, Genny about how she would know when it was time for us to go to the hospital.  She said that most women say the same phrase right before they hit the peak of labor, and when she hears that phrase that means it’s time to go.

What’s the magic phrase?

I can’t do this anymore.

I remember that moment vividly during Lila’s labor.  It was 7:00am and I was perched on the couch in our living room in the only position that felt comfortable and I had been laboring since the evening before.  I thought I couldn’t do it anymore and I said so.  If you remember the story, you’ll remember that I actually could do it some more – eight hours some more.  My firstborn tumbled into this world at 3:28pm December 16, 2009.

Three years later, here we are: anticipating our next girl.  No swollen ankles this time and a totally different kind of labor.

I woke up Saturday feeling discouraged.  It had been over 100 days since we had first learned about our girl and over two months since we had heard anything from her birth family to give us any insight into what they were thinking.  It was getting too hard.  I felt like I was running out of grace for the wait and I knew that it would likely be at least another 6 days before we heard anything.  I didn’t think I could make it another 6 days.  I cried and prayed:

I can’t do this anymore.

It turns out I was running out of grace for the wait, but not because God sold me short - because the wait was over.  An hour after I cried my "peak of labor" prayer, I checked my email and read the most beautiful and unexpected words:
“{Faith’s Birth Mom} is planning on being in town and would like to meet you.”  It went on to say that Faith’s birth mom had been making preparations for Faith to transition to our care and that she would like to begin having visits with us over the course of the next few weeks.

I read and re-read the email not daring to believe what I thought it was saying.  She wants to meet us. This is happening!

Less than two hours later – before we’d even had a chance to respond to the first email -  another email appeared in my inbox, subject line: Even Newer Developments – IMPORTANT!

This is where it gets crazy.

Faith’s birth mom had called and indicated that she would like us to come pick Faith up sometime before March 31st preferably TUESDAY.  This was Saturday, so in THREE DAYS.  Oh yeah, and they live 7 hours away.

We went from overjoyed and shocked to thrilled and panicked!  Three hours earlier we didn’t even know if Faith’s birth parents were still considering adoption and now they wanted us to pick her up in three days!  We were going to be a family of four in three days!  Lila was going to be a big sister in 3 days!  We were going to have a six-month-old in our house in THREE DAYS! "AAAAAHHHHHH!" said my brain!

The Husband was cracking me up.  We got the second email in the midst of lunch and when I read it aloud, he got up from the table and immediately went into Faith’s room and started banging on the crib, readjusting the mattress. 

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” I called to him, laughing.

“I don’t know!  You told me to readjust the bed!” 

The Husband’s reaction was to jump into action, my reaction was to cry into my Dr. Pepper, making really awkward noises that prompted Lila to ask “Mommy, why are you making that sound?”  Don’t worry, Sweetie, Mommy’s brain is just exploding.

I felt like I had zip-lined from the pit of despair to the top of the glowing mountain and my emotions weren’t quite sure how they were supposed to respond.  We both just walked around in shaky trances the rest of the day occasionally saying things like, “This is happening” and “we’re getting a baby!” and "what do we need to do?"

There were several things that had to fall into place for things to move forward.  And once again, I’m not going to get into specifics because I want to protect Faith’s birth family.  I will say that most of the things that needed to fall into place involved offices and businesses that typically aren’t open on the weekend so we were going to have to wait until Monday morning before we knew when we would leave. 

I occupied myself by scrambling to find a substitute for my class on Wednesday, writing up sub plans, and trying to get Faith's room into a state that said more "Welcome home!" than "We didn't know if you were coming or not!"  The Husband continued to bang on furniture and tackle the to-do list we had been casually making for the last three months – always wondering if we would actually need to do the things on it in the end.

I guess I’ll skip forward and say that it is currently 6:51pm on Monday March 25, 2013 and I am typing this as we drive to the town where we will meet our little girl tomorrow. 

In the last 24 hours alone, God has been putting together a complicated puzzle in the most miraculous way and all we can say is what we’ve been saying all day:

The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with joy!

P.S. These posts will be coming about a day late so I actually wrote this yesterday.  I'll write one about today's adventures and post it tomorrow.  Stay tuned!


Dana Butler said...

To say I'm SO EXCITED would be the biggest understatement of the world. It is 1:26 as I write this and I am praying.... NOW.

Sarah B said...

I have been thinking about and praying for you all so much today! Cannot wait for the next installment. Prayers for a joyful, beautiful and smooth transition as life changing hellos and good byes are exchanged. Love you guys!