2. I took Faith to the doctor last week because I was worried she couldn't hear as well as she should. I was right. She failed the hearing test in both ears and we were referred to Children's Mercy. I can't explain it, but I was caught off guard by how upset I was. I mean, I took her in because I thought she couldn't hear. I don't know why I was so surprised when they told me she can't.* I think part of me was hoping they'd find a bunch of wax in there and clean her out and she'd be good as new. And now I have two weeks to fret and stew and panic and allow my mind to wander to the worst case scenario - and I'm not even sure what the worst case scenario might be! I think part of the reason I am upset is that I know that she will likely have a hard time communicating anyway. To think about adding another element that will hinder her language acquisition and communication skills is really sad. I'm trying to just keep my mind in neutral territory until we know more. It's not really working, but that's what I'm trying!
*She can hear. She responds to some sounds, just not as sensitively as I think she should be responding. And she's pretty behind verbally which can go hand-in-hand with hearing problems. I clarify this because I've expressed my worries to people and they'll say "See? She can hear!" when they see her respond to a certain sound. Yes, she can hear, but not as well as she should.
|Sisters. This is a daily scene. Lila wants to hold Faith which turns into Faith attempting to eat Lila's face. As you can see, Lila hates it.|
|I stumbled upon this little scene when I went to put the sheets back on after laundering them. I texted it to my family with the caption "Lila was here."|
4. In the midst of this latest sleep saga, I've been trying to remain focused on the positive things Lila is doing - for both of our sakes. I find myself being especially congratulatory over the smallest accomplishments and reminding myself that her good behavior is achieved with great effort since she is overcoming the two handicaps of sleep deprivation and well, being three-and-a-half. So, when she does things like make my bed for me I ooh and ahh and gush over what a great job she did and what a big help she is and how glad I am to be her Mommy. The intended result is that she doesn't only hear me griping at her and I remember that she's awesome. It's working.
|So proud of herself. Don't tell her she left a good chunk of the bed naked. We'll give her an A for effort.|
|Forgive the blurry picture. This is the only one in which all four kids are looking at the camera. Oh wait. Only two are. Well, it's still the best one out of the several I took!|
|"Oh, don't mind me. I'll just fall asleep right here."|
That's all, folks.